Gottman’s Sound Relationship House

Gottman’s Sound Relationship House is a model developed by psychologists Drs. John and Julie Gottman, based on their extensive research on relationships. The model is designed to help couples understand the key elements that make up a healthy and satisfying relationship.

The Sound Relationship House consists of nine building blocks, each of which represents a different aspect of a healthy relationship. These building blocks are:

  1. Build Love Maps: This is about knowing each other’s inner world, including each other’s hopes, fears, dreams, and values.
  2. Share Fondness and Admiration: This is about expressing positive feelings and appreciation for each other, and focusing on the positive aspects of the relationship.
  3. Turn Towards Each Other: This is about making a conscious effort to pay attention to each other, and to respond to each other’s bids for connection.
  4. The Positive Perspective: This is about seeing the relationship and each other’s actions in a positive light, and avoiding negativity and criticism.
  5. Manage Conflict: This is about resolving conflicts in a healthy and constructive way, and avoiding the destructive patterns of The Four Horsemen.
  6. Make Life Dreams Come True: This is about working together to achieve shared goals and aspirations, and supporting each other’s individual goals.
  7. Create Shared Meaning: This is about building a shared vision for the future, and creating a sense of shared purpose and meaning.
  8. Trust: This is about creating a safe and secure environment in the relationship, where partners can be open and vulnerable with each other.
  9. Commitment: This is about making a long-term commitment to each other and to the relationship, and maintaining a positive attitude towards each other and the relationship.

Gottman’s Sound Relationship House is a useful tool for couples to understand the key elements of a healthy relationship, and to identify areas where they may need to work to strengthen their relationship. By focusing on the building blocks of the Sound Relationship House, couples can work together to build a strong and healthy relationship that is built to last.

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